The Hearse and the Heart: Inside the Compassionate World of AF White's Funeral Services

What does it really take to serve a community beyond the expected? In this compelling conversation with Mike from AF White's Funeral Directors, we explore the powerful intersection of a solemn profession and vibrant community engagement.

Mike takes us through his journey from hospital porter to funeral service operative, revealing the dedication and compassion required to support families through their most difficult moments. There's something deeply moving about hearing how someone who works daily with mortality approaches community service with such zest for life.

The conversation shifts from the practicalities of funeral services to heartwarming stories of local impact. Mike shares how AF White's has grown from humble beginnings (a motorcycle with a sidecar for transporting coffins!) to a respected family business with six locations. What stands out isn't just their business growth, but their philosophy of staying deeply connected to the communities they serve.

Where this episode truly shines is in Mike's passionate advocacy for hands-on community involvement. Rather than simply writing cheques, he emphasizes the importance of showing up—at food banks, community gardens, and school projects. His firsthand accounts of distributing food parcels and seeing children's faces light up with donated treats remind us that time is often more valuable than money when it comes to making a difference.

The discussion also touches on deeper societal issues, with poignant observations about how technology requirements have complicated basic needs, and how small gestures can make enormous differences in community wellbeing.

This episode will leave you reconsidering what it means for a business to truly serve its community, while perhaps changing your perception of funeral directors along the way. Join us for this unexpectedly uplifting conversation about life, death, and the community connections that make both more meaningful.

A.F Whites Funeral Services

Email:   hyde@afwhitesfuneralservices.co.uk

Phone:   0161 637 1230

Address: 4 Valley Parade, Hattersley Road West, Hattersley, Hyde,  SK14 3FL

Website - https://afwhitesfuneralservices.co.uk/

Chapters

• 2:00 Meet Mike from AF White's Funeral Services
• 6:09 Life as a Funeral Service Operative
• 9:55 From Hospital Porter to Funeral Director
• 15:28 Community Contributions and Local Support
• 21:53 Making Funeral Services Accessible
• 26:23 Local Services with Personal Touches
• 28:49 Closing Thoughts and Contact Information

Transcript

Mark: 0:07

hello and welcome to another episode of hats, chats and giggles podcast. Yep, I'm your host, mark, and this is our first podcast of 2025. In the studio today with me, we've got Mike here from A&F. A&f, af. White's funeral directors Say hello, mike, mike, hi, mark, thanks for having me. Alright, and we're going to be talking. Well, we're just going to be talking. We're going to be talking about the funeral directors and the contribution that they're making to our local community. So make yourself a brew, sit down, take your shoes off and make yourself at home for this next podcast.

Mark: 1:12

Before we get started, I'd like to do a big shout out to the twins in G-Cross and girls. It's not Elvis Presley and, like I said, we're not even running a competition at this point, so I don't know what you've been listening to, but it isn't Hats, chats and Giggles. Hello, mike, how are you?

Mark: 1:43

Mark, thanks for having me. I'm good, I'm good. Well, thank you for coming into our amazing studio. Take notice of the dirty pots. They're going to get washed by Beryl. She's in Iron Appa, apparently raving at the moment. She's going to be back on Friday. I'm just leaving them pots there for her to clean up when she gets back.

Mike: 2:04

I've heard good things about Beryl.

Mark: 2:05

y.

Mark: 2:06

Yep, you can't beat a bit of Beryl. Anyway, thanks for coming in. So first off, you're a Hattersley lad.

Mike: 2:16

I am indeed. Yeah, I've lived here for four years now. I've lived in Hattersley, right. I moved up here to live with my current girlfriend. It's quite funny, mark, because when I first met my girlfriend and I asked her where are you living now? She said Mottram. And then, when she sent me an address to come up here and see her, I'm like this is Hattersley and she swears blind. We live in Mottram.

Mark: 2:39

Oh, s she's one of them. She's one of them, mark. Well, you know you. You know you get them. So what are your thoughts about that? How do you feel? How do you like it? Do you like living around here?

Mike: 2:56

it's a good place, mark it's changed a lot from the years. You know people don't look at you funny anymore when they tell you you know where do you live? And you say you don't get them dirty looks anymore. Right, it's an ugly place. There's an Aldi being built, apparently. You know it's getting there, isn't it?

Mark: 3:11

yeah, yeah, I like it. I like the way it's panning out. It's going to be good to see the new developments when they're green. That's a rubbish joke in it, anyway. So tell us a bit about, um, your job.

Mike: 3:36

So I'm a funeral service operative for afy's funeral services, um, so that basically means I do all things funerals. So when somebody passes away at home or in hospital, I'll be the person that collects that person and brings them into our care, um, I'll then dress that person, clean that person, get them prepared um for chapel, you know, we'll put that person in coffin, ready for the family to come and spend time with them. Then on the day of the service, I'll drive the funeral vehicles, whether that be a hearse or a limousine, onto their service church, graveyard, crematorium, whatever that may be and then spending time and getting to know the family in between as well, doing everything from start to finish.

Mark: 4:21

Right, Sounds like an interesting job, but I suppose it takes a certain type of person to take that up as a career path really.

Mike: 4:32

Yeah, it's definitely not your normal job. Every day is different, it has its emotional side of it as well, but it's an honour to do. It's an honour that somebody can trust you with their loved one. Once they've met you for a short period of time and then you know they're trusting you is such a big thing. So it's important that we build that connection with families and knowing that their loved one's safe in our care and we're going to do the best that we can to look after them and the families as well, because we're not there just for the funeral. We'll be're afterwards to support those families as well, and that's that's important yeah, it's really important, um, really important job, really.

Mark: 5:09

Um so what? Inspired, you to become a funeral director, then?

Mike: 5:16

so I used to work at the hospital as a porter, um, and then. So when people passed away within the hospital, we'd transport them to the mortuary. I always thought, what happens from that point? What happens, you know, after I've put that person in the mortuary? Where do they go from there? You know how are they looked after? And that's what intrigued me to do it.

Mike: 5:36

I was fortunate enough to get a job in the industry. It's very hard to get into the industry and I started work with a big corporate company and industry um, and I started work with a big corporate company and it was, it was great, and that's where I got all my experience and I just loved it from day one. From the start I absolutely loved it um. And then I was fortunate enough to get in with af whites, which is a family run business, um, so it's not corporate, we're a small business but always growing. You know we've got um a nice fleet of vehicles because we hire out our vehicles as well. So my boss started off as a. He started off with a motorbike and a sidecar or trailer and carrying coffins around to the funerals, um, like a trike and a hearse sort of thing, yes, yeah, that's how we started off and you know it was.

Mike: 6:21

It was brilliant, really big demand for it for bikers, funerals and things like that. And then he started off buying limousines and hearses and then he thought you know what, I'm going to get the funeral homes as well. So that's what he's done. And now we've got six shops all over Greater Manchester, mainly Tameside, with Hattersley Branch being our newest one, just next to one. Stop up there, yep, seen it one. Stop up there, yep, seeing it, seeing the one. Yeah, so, um, yeah, it's.

Mike: 6:46

It's a great little family run business. We're a great team. We're all proud of what we do. We all work to the same standards. Um, you know, because it's, it's a very you. I don't know if you'd be able to imagine, but you know, if you're dressing someone's loved one, you've got someone there in your care. You want the best for them, you want to. You want the best for them, you, you, you want to dress them a certain way, you want to take care, and we're all pedantic about certain little things and we all respect each other's things like that, you know, and we all work to a high standard, right right.

Mark: 7:19

So how long have you been working in this profession again?

Mike: 7:23

Probably about four or five years.

Mark: 7:26

Right and you've been working locally.

Mike: 7:28

Yeah, always locally, Our way inside yeah.

Mark: 7:31

What motivated you to start? You know you're doing stuff. You're doing quite a bit of community involvement, which is one of the reasons why I invited you into the show. What motivated you to start donating to charities and stuff?

Mike: 7:48

harsley's a great place, as you know, mark, it's it's a small place. Well, it's a big place, but you know it's a small, close-knit community. Um, harsley's still got that like old-time villagey style. Everybody knows everyone. Beddle knows work time. You close your curtains at tea time. You know, everyone knows everything about everyone.

Mike: 8:08

Um, and with our, with us just coming into the estate, we wanted people to be aware of our business. But we also wanted people to be aware that, yes, although we are a funeral directors, we are approachable. We're normal people. We live day-to-day lives. We've got kids home, you know. And what better way to do that than go and help the community?

Mike: 8:28

There's so many great causes on the estate, such as I've helped out the local food bank, ran from St Barnabas Church, and then we've been to the Hattersley Garden community projects. That's just amazing. I don't know if you've been yourself, but the work they do there is absolutely amazing. Um, all the people that run the place, all the volunteers they're just amazing people. Um pinfall primary school we've helped out there as well with we did a christmas tree competition which the kids loved. We displayed all the christmas trees in our shop windows and we took all the kids to selection box and they loved it, you know. So obviously we don't go to the kids tell them what we are and what we do and everything like that, but for them, knowing that their christmas trees were put in a shop window and they were seeing it, with the mums and dads walking past when they're going to the chippy or something like that, it's great, you know, because they see that and then they get the.

Mike: 9:23

We was meant to pick one winner, but we couldn't, so we we picked 32 winners and they all won a selection box um but, yeah, I just think it's important then, if you've got the opportunity to be in a good community, then get yourself into it, you know, and help out wherever you can, and if we're in a position to help out, we will help out well, that's kind of what inspired me, because I originally saw you in the food bank early on a friday morning helping out and it really kind of touched me.

Mark: 9:49

I just like that kind of stuff going on in communities because it just makes the place a better place to live really. I mean, there's lots of businesses in the area that never, never interact with with the other stuff that's going on with the community. I, I admire it and I really like it. I saw the Christmas trees in this shop up front. They were great, weren't?

Mike: 10:10

they. Yeah, the thing you said about the food bank, mark, is we all hear about food banks. Fortunately, I've never had to go to one and ask for help, which I'm grateful for. But it's okay handing over a cheque or giving them money or whatever. But we want to get in there. We want to know what what they're doing and who they're doing it for and help them, because time's more expensive than money, isn't it? You can't put a price on your time. Yeah, so just by us going up helping them set up in the morning, they're very grateful by doing that. Um, we've not managed to be there the past couple of weeks just because we've been extremely busy with the nature of our job.

Mark: 10:43

Um, but yeah, moving forward, we will be there again and we will be helping out there again, hopefully yeah, well, that kind gestures like that go a long way and I see them every week in the food bank. I do help myself from time to time. I'll help them load up and stuff, and it's just good to have people from the community coming together. It was good to see. How do you choose which groups that you're gonna you're gonna uh support, are you gonna get involved in?

Mike: 11:11

that's the our thing, isn't it? There's so many great groups, you know. You know yourself, mark. If you go and meet someone, you see how genuine they are. You see the grateful that the, the goodness that they do for the community, and it's the ones that stand out to you that you think. You know what I want to help them, that they're doing something amazing there. Um, and, like I said, having kids myself, also using some of the local projects, and that kind of inspires me to think this is so good.

Mike: 11:38

Look how much my kids are enjoying this. For example, the christmas party at the garden center. You know, we went with my kids and they had a great time and that made me think this is actually so good. You know, they didn't. Well, they charged a little bit of contribution, you know, and they got to see santa, they got hot chocolates, they got a sandwich and they got to do arts and grass. And it cost us nothing hardly you. You know, a couple of quid. We walked to it, we didn't even have to drive it's over the road, and just seeing the kids have a fun day out for a couple of quid, and that made me think, okay, how can we help these out now. This is great. My kids have enjoyed this. So many other families have done as well. People have not got the money nowadays. We haven't certainly got the money to go on big drives out, big days out anymore, like used to be able to a couple years ago.

Mark: 12:25

So the fact that we've got something like that in the community should be utilized definitely yeah, there's quite a lot of stuff going on uh in hasley, but it's not enough people know about it. In fact, that's one of the reasons what this podcast is about. We interviewed I interviewed Leslie last summer at the big community garden project.

Mike: 12:46

Yeah.

Mark: 12:48

When she was still developing the building and doing stuff down there. I'm probably going to try and get in touch with them again and see how that's developed, because all them things have gone on since. So it's just good to see how that's developed because all them things have gone on since. So it's just good to see how that's grown and just that community capacity building, like you're saying, your kids being able to go somewhere. That's not going to cost an arm and a leg. I mean everything. Everyone's being screwed over by the cost of living crisis and the cost of fuel and everything. Everything just seems to be going out of the window. So it's just nice to have you know people setting things up, setting nice community events up that aren't money orientated.

Mike: 13:33

Yeah and it makes a big difference that they're just normal people like me and you. You know, I know a couple of volunteers. There are teachers at the local schools like me and you. You know I know a couple of volunteers. There are teachers at the local schools, you know, and it just shows the genuine good people out to do good for their community, which is just amazing.

Mark: 13:48

Yeah, definitely. So what ways do you think funeral homes can contribute to community wellbeing?

Mike: 14:01

It's a hard one, isn't it Matt? Because some people walk past and they put their head down. They don't want to speak to me. Because I'm there, I'm in a suit, I've got a black tie on. They find me scary. Or if I'm in a pub and someone says, what do you do for a living, I tell them they go you weirdo. Or other people it goes the other way. They're really interested. They ask. Or other people it goes the other way, they're really interested. They ask me thousands of questions.

Mike: 14:27

The way we can contribute towards the community is just by keep doing what we're doing helping out wherever we can with different projects that's going on. Make the community aware that we are approachable and that if you are passing the funeral home, you can pop in for a chat. You don't have to come in to you know to book a funeral with us. Although we do accept prepaid plans, we do. That's something that we do offer, um, but you know we're just normal people. Come in for a chat. We're part of the community. You know we're all one big family, um, and moving forward. You know, even if you have not used our services in the past and you know you some, your personal well-being is something you're struggling with. You can always pop in for a chat about anything, any matter whatsoever that's good to know, that's uh nice to know.

Mark: 15:10

Um, how is your, how's your work or has your work changed your perspective on community support, Like, do you know like as doing this, as getting into the community and doing this kind of work, you know like going and helping out the food bank and going and getting involved in some of these community groups? Has it changed your perspective? Do you think, over time?

Mike: 15:39

Definitely. I think the role that I do anyway certainly opens up your eyes and makes you appreciate the little things in life. You know. It makes you get home and hold your family that little bit closer, seeing the things that I do see on day in, day out and then going to something like the food bank and volunteering our time there it's. You see people come in struggling and you know they're getting simple things given to them that we take for granted every single day, and it's a shame that you know people still live like that in this day and age. Like you said, there's so many crises going on at the moment. People can't afford simplest of things, which is scary. You know it's. It's we're in 2025 and people are grateful for such small things nowadays, like the simple necessities yeah, that's true, and I was thinking about this last night.

Mark: 16:30

actually, is that the other thing, now that there's a, there's a thing, now that's happened I mean, I've, I've lived through it is we all need a phone now?

Mike: 16:41

Yeah.

Mark: 16:41

And we all need the internet now. And sometimes you get people moaning saying, oh, you know these people on benefits they spend their money on, they've all got phones. But you need one now, don't you? Everyone needs to have a phone, that's it To do the banking to, you know, to make a doctor's appointment, to do everything.

Mike: 17:02

I think they even do doctor's appointments on your phone nowadays, don't they? So you know, you send them a picture and they say yeah, that's gangrene. You know, that's the way it goes, isn't it?

Mark: 17:10

Yeah, everything's done you need the internet nowadays, so it's like a. So before people have got food on the table, they need to make sure that they've got a phone and internet connection that's it. It's all backwards, isn't it? I don't know, I'm trying to get my head around it. So, um, what are the kind of long-term goals for community engagement? Are you going to carry on this kind of stuff just do?

Mike: 17:32

as much as we can mark. Um, you know, with the nature of my job, as you know things we're on call 24 7 365. You know, I was out boxing day, um, I was out christmas, christmas eve, and we're always on hand to help families. So, as you know, I arranged to meet you and I had to cancel because I had an emergency call coming. I had to go and bring a loved one into our care. See, that's why we can't really commit to something on certain days and certain times. But, moving forward, we are going to just keep doing what we're doing getting in and helping out where we can and when we can, as much as we can.

Mark: 18:15

Okay, well, I want to thank you personally anyway for linking me up with the Stanley Stanley Square Kebab House. Stanley Square Kebab House. Yeah, they dropped a load of pizzas off at the Creative Club. How did that come about?

Mike: 18:31

Obviously. I came up to the Creative Club a few weeks before and I brought some snacks up for the kids, just because it's amazing what you do, you know, and it's taking the crisps up, and I brought you some bread for toast as well, Seeing the kids how much they appreciated that and how hungry they all were. I thought I'd seen a post on Facebook, Stanley Square Clubhouse the helper out in the community donating pizzas and whatever else, and he said does anyone know anyone that would benefit from this? And straight away you just popped into my mind. So yeah, that's how it, that's how it happened. Oh, thanks for that. We got loads of pizzas.

Mark: 19:02

I didn't get a slice today. No, he didn't. No adults got any slices because the young people just scoffed them all. I'm glad they enjoyed it. Yeah, they did and thanks, thanks for that. So, um, yeah, for the benefit of the listener there, we run a, a creative club in that as live for young people and, like mike's just said, he came down to make a donation from AF Whites and a couple of weeks later he linked me up with the Stanley Square Keep Ab House. So big shout out to Stanley Square there for their contribution. Yeah, that's just for you guys. Thank you very much and thank you, mike, for linking us up. It's them kind of gestures and moments of serendipity that I don't know, make our rich, our community, a much richer place. Have you got anything else more to say about the f whites? And if you need anything to plug, yeah, just that we you know we're here if you need us.

Mike: 20:06

I mean, I don't know you. Everyone always laughs and jokes just put me in a bag, send me to the sea, put me in the garden, put me in the bin, whatever else. I mean, it's something that we've all got in common, isn't it? Mark, it's all gonna happen to us one day. We're all we're all gonna pass common, isn't?

Mark: 20:22

it.

Mike: 20:23

Mark, it's all going to happen to us one day. We're all going to pass away. Yeah, you know it does happen and we're there if you need us to. And a lot of people still have in their minds that these companies that advertise on television and radio constantly, you know that they're the cheapest. Big, big old companies are the cheapest and they're not because if you come to us we we're cheaper than them and we're better than them and you can come and see that for yourselves.

Mike: 20:47

You know the way we look after families, the way we can add those personal touches. We offer direct cremation services, which is something you see advertised a lot on the television, and we offer it at a smaller price than what they advertise it at. And everything's kept around here. So your loved ones kept around here, your loved ones cremated in a local crematorium. You know it's nothing like these, these big places where, unfortunately, they take your loved one down to london and cremate them in london and then and your ashes get sent back to you a couple of months after or whatever. We're not like that. We're local, we're independent and we stay local and we're totally open and honest with everything we do. Um, so our other shops we've got shops in stay the bridge, ashton, um. And we're just on mosley road in ashton as well. You, you know where the little tesco is. We're just near the little tesco on mosley road as you went up to the hospital there oh yeah so that's our head office there.

Mike: 21:44

That's amazing facilities, um, and then we're in. Obviously our newest branch is in Hattersley, and then we've got a shop in Oldham, in Shaw, and then our funeral home in Hill Green as well, stockport, hill Green and all of our facilities, all of our funeral homes have state-of-the-art facilities. We've got mortuaries in every single one of them. So say, if that's something else, mark, that being somewhere within Hattersley, say, with it being such a close community, it means so much that if we do collect someone and bring them into our care from the estate, they're staying on the estate, they're not going to another branch somewhere else, because we've got the facilities to keep them where they want to be kept yeah, I think that's important, really, yeah, and the last thing you need to be doing, uh, when you're grieving and you've lost a loved one, is to start I don't know drive it, try to make your way all over that's it, you know or even being lied to about where your loved one's being kept, which a lot of the big companies.

Mike: 22:47

Unfortunately, they're not as transparent with all that as what we are. We're totally honest and we're there to take all the pressure off you. We're there to answer all those questions that you think are daft, questions which they're not, if you've never done it before. That's what we're there for. We take care of everything for you. But, yeah, check us out if you want more information. We're on all the socials, you know. We're on google and whatever else. You can see. We're really proud of our five-star reviews that we've got got some amazing reviews on there. That just shows what sort of company that we are all right.

Mark: 23:20

Well, what I'll do is I'll in the podcast description, I will leave links. I'll leave an email, your email address and all links to your socials and your website and stuff for the benefit of anyone who's unfortunately going through or feels the need. How would you encourage other local businesses to get involved in making some sort of contribution to the community like you have done?

Mike: 23:50

I think they've got to do what I've done. Mark, get out for yourself and see what good it does in the community Because, like I said, it's all right sending money out, isn't it? It's all right sending a cheque, but get out there, get hands on and see why they're taking the snacks for the kids. See how happy it makes the kids Going helping taking the snacks for the kids. See how happy it makes the kids going helping out at the food bank, handing out them food parcels yourself, packing them food parcels yourself. You know, seeing that they're all, they're running low on cereals this week, that's what they need this week. You know, don't just send 20 tins of beans. They've got loads of beans. They don't need beans anymore. Yeah, then you know it's. Go out and see it for yourself, because all the organisations are more than happy to you know they'll welcome you with open arms. If you offer a helping hand, they're going to want you. They're going to want that help.

Mark: 24:35

Okay, well, thanks for coming in, mike. No, thank you for having me. You know, I'd just like to say thanks for all the work that you're doing within the community and to your boss. I'm really interested in the story of him, of how he started out. That's great, isn't it? Being a bike at funeral service sounds great. I bet he's got some stories to tell. But yeah, thanks for coming. Thanks for coming in, mike, and thanks for listening. Folks, if you want any information, you'll find that on the podcast description. And, yeah, big shout, mike. Thank you, and to everyone at AF White's Funeral Service, thank you for listening to Hats, chats and Giggles podcast. Don't forget to follow us on social media for updates.

Mark: 25:29

Thank you for listening to Hats, chats and Giggles podcast. Don't forget to follow us on social media for updates. Just type in Hats, chats and Giggles and you should be able to find us on Facebook, instagram, twitter and YouTube. Please follow, comment, subscribe to all our media channels. Do it now, or else we're going to rush your doors and we're going to tickle you to death. And don't forget if you're the local community, group or business and would like to come on the show and tell us what you've been up to. Don't hesitate to get in touch. Or maybe you're a local resident with a story to share, a bee in your bonnet or beef to get off your chest? Drop us a voice note on 07365 223 720. That's 07365 223 720. Until next time. Folks Hate less, love more. Make peace, not war, and tell your grandma thanks for the rabbits. Turn on, tune in and rip the knob off. To Hats Chats Giggles podcast Peace. To Hats Chats and Giggles podcast Peace.